Alas, poor Southshore! I think I'll miss you.


Just doing my part for the Forsaken war effort!


As most players will know, one of the larger casualties of Cataclysm has been the Alliance town of Southshore, in the Hillsbrad Foothills. Now I have to admit, I wasn't exactly crushed by this news. Okay, I was actually eggceptionally amused. There may have been cackling.

This really shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone reading this blog. I mean, I've written about my hatred for that place before. In fact, I'm just going to quote eggxactly from that post here:

"I've spent a lot of time there, and have been flagged/jumped by guards/ganked by nearby Alliance players more times than I can count. As a result, I've built up a lot of spite towards that dinky little town. I hate that place. I hate those NPCs. My favorite quest in Hillsbrad was always the one where you resurrected Helcular in the Southshore graveyard and let him run amok, slaughtering hapless town guards in a delightful murder spree."

But recently, it has occurred to me that shockingly, I will actually miss that sad little hovel! Not that I ever quested there as Alliance. Not that I'll miss it for its historical importance (that's what the Caverns of Time version is for!). And I certainly don't care that its lowly residents most likely died in horrible, plague-ridden eggony. >:D

No, I will miss it for one simple reason - I will no longer be able to ruin the lives of Southshore residents during my favorite seasonal event, Hallow's End!


One of the best quests in the game!


Thinking back, that may be why Hallow's End is my holiday of choice - the joy of hurling noxious Forsaken Stink Bombs into that wretched little village, the eggciting rush of stampeding into the cozy little inn and ruthlessly spoiling Alliance kegs of ale. Ahh, it brings a smile to my face even now. Good times.

I'm not eggxaggerating, either! "Hallowed Be Thy Name" is the only seasonal event I actually complete on ALL of my mains, and The Hallowed is one of the only titles I use to this day, even though I have more "prestigious" ones. I mean sure, I had to kill the Lich King to get the Kingslayer title, which is cool and all. But for the Hallowed? I got to grief and harass Southshore and make their lives miserable. That wasn't an accomplishment - it was recreation. :D

But now, Southshore is in ruins, with puddles of slime and goo everywhere. There's simply no longer any need to throw stink bombs around - they couldn't possibly make the place any worse. (Plus, there's no one left to notice.) And the inn is now empty and barren, devoid of the untapped, precious ale that was just BEGGING to be tainted.


Southshore's inn, today. No civilians to frighten, no keggs to spoil. *sniff* :(


It's just not going to be the same this year.

So farewell, Southshore. I hated you, I hated everything about you, and I was eggstatic to see you utterly destroyed. But I'll miss you a little bit this year...you were my favorite victims.

You really helped a Forsaken feel eggstraordinarily Rotten.


WHERE IS YOUR POWER OF PINE NOW, HUMANS?

5 Responses Subscribe to comments

  1. gravatar
    gnomeaggedon.net

    Subtle... not.

    but nevertheless an entertaining insertion.

    April 24, 2011 at 1:10 AM

  2. gravatar
    Apple

    Somehow, I don't think those are the actual eggs... too simple. *narrows eyes* He's trying to confound googlers, i think.

    April 24, 2011 at 1:30 AM

  3. gravatar
    Andy

    A fine eggxample of punning eggcellence! I have to say though, you missed a few, e.g.g. the 'exactly' in the first paragraph :O

    April 24, 2011 at 11:58 AM

  4. gravatar
    Redbeard

    Ya know, I just don't care about the eggsplanation. If you played Horde on a PvP server, then you know without a doubt that Hillsbrad is Ground Zero for Alliance gankers. One of the things I made sure I did when I finally got Quintalan to L80 was to go and sit on a hill overlooking Tarren Mill, waiting to turn the tables on those gankers. Of course, they never showed when I was there, but I felt I was paying it forward to all of those lowbies who had to put up with that crap.

    As for game terms, Sylvanas had had enough and merely used the WoW version of the Atomic Bomb in retaliation.

    April 24, 2011 at 6:14 PM

  5. gravatar
    Mhorgrim

    Heh, this was a fun post, well written from the Forasaken! Actually on the servers I have been playing on (Emerald Dream and Ravenholdt) I rarely ever see the Alliance come around. It's a shame, I miss all the fun!

    April 25, 2011 at 11:43 AM